God and Nature Fall 2022
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By Rev. Dr. Mario Anthony Russo
Nathan was traumatized by his church. Fifteen years ago, his calling and faith were publicly called into question by his small evangelical church. His church leaders held secret meetings to discuss his future membership in the church. He was gaslit, publicly shamed, and ridiculed. Broken, lost, and hurting, he left the church and his evangelical faith. Nathan is the victim of traumatic spiritual abuse. Today, he is numbered among the thousands of people “deconstructing” from the Christian faith. How can Christians help? Where does healing begin for those deconstructing because of trauma experienced in the church?
In his book The Ethics of Beauty, Eastern Orthodox professor Dr. Timothy Patitsas suggests a radical solution. Basically, we’ve got it all backwards. Western culture, says Patitsas, emphasizes a “truth first” approach to soul care. We determine truth first so that it will lead to an experience of goodness, which will lead to beauty. But we need to turn that around. We must pursue beauty first, so that it will lead to an experience of goodness, which will lead us to the truth. This “beauty first” approach has massive implications for helping people to heal from trauma.
Nathan was traumatized by his church. Fifteen years ago, his calling and faith were publicly called into question by his small evangelical church. His church leaders held secret meetings to discuss his future membership in the church. He was gaslit, publicly shamed, and ridiculed. Broken, lost, and hurting, he left the church and his evangelical faith. Nathan is the victim of traumatic spiritual abuse. Today, he is numbered among the thousands of people “deconstructing” from the Christian faith. How can Christians help? Where does healing begin for those deconstructing because of trauma experienced in the church?
In his book The Ethics of Beauty, Eastern Orthodox professor Dr. Timothy Patitsas suggests a radical solution. Basically, we’ve got it all backwards. Western culture, says Patitsas, emphasizes a “truth first” approach to soul care. We determine truth first so that it will lead to an experience of goodness, which will lead to beauty. But we need to turn that around. We must pursue beauty first, so that it will lead to an experience of goodness, which will lead us to the truth. This “beauty first” approach has massive implications for helping people to heal from trauma.
I am saying that they need to experience more of the beauty of God. |
Here are three things that can help. These three points are based on Patitsas’ book and emerged from my personal conversations with him. I should add that there are a couple of assumptions these steps make. 1) First and foremost, make sure the deconstructing person is removed from their traumatic environment. This is essential. A person cannot heal if they are still in a traumatizing environment. 2) These three steps are not sequential. A person may start with any step and repeat any step. A person may be doing two or all three steps simultaneously. The order is not important.
1. Get Comfortable with God
Trauma separates us from God. It can lead us to question the goodness and power of God, as well as our own trust in him. Prof. Patitsas says that it is very difficult to heal when our relationship with God is broken. The place to begin with healing ourselves is by rediscovering the beauty of God.
What is the best way to experience the beauty of God? Prayer. Now, I need to be perfectly clear. I am not saying that those hurting from painful church trauma need to pray more. I am saying that they need to experience more of the beauty of God. This can be done through experiencing beauty in nature, music, art, dance, travel, or a dozen other ways. All these experiences of beauty are in some way an experience of God. But the simplest, easiest, most cost-effective way to experience the beauty of God is in prayer.
At first, this can be difficult for a traumatized person. They may be angry at God or struggle with feelings of betrayal. But the process of healing is not a quick or painless one. It requires time and repeated effort. Nathan tried this approach. Some days, he yelled at God. He cried and screamed and told God exactly what he thought about him and his church. Other days, Nathan did nothing but sit in the silent presence of God. Experiencing healing with God is a journey that one never finishes, and it gets slowly better over a long time.
2. Get Comfortable with Yourself
Trauma separates us from ourselves. I once heard someone struggling with trauma describe it this way: “I can’t stand to be around myself.” Part of the process of healing from trauma is getting reacquainted and reunited with yourself.
Victims of church trauma often internalize the rejection they experienced and believe that they deserve it. But they don’t. The work of healing from church trauma is a struggle to accept ourselves just as God accepts us.
I realize that, at first, this doesn’t sound very hopeful. How can we tell people who are struggling with trauma that they must struggle to find healing? Because trauma damages a person, and struggling heals us. When a person is traumatized, they are dehumanized. But to struggle is to be human. It is through struggling to heal from trauma that we regain our humanity.
And what do we say to those who are overwhelmed by the struggle? A beauty-first approach calls us to struggle for them. If they cannot struggle, we will struggle for them until they are ready to join us in their struggle. This is the role that Christians can play. Struggling with and for one another is a form of beauty. We can struggle for the traumatized until they have the strength to struggle. Then, we struggle together. Struggling together is beautiful, and it is part of healing.
3. Get Comfortable with Humanity
Trauma separates us from others. Traumatized persons often isolate themselves from society and allow their friendships to lapse, so a final component of healing and restoring our humanity is reuniting us with the rest of humanity. A simple way of doing this is through giving. Yes, through giving we can reunite ourselves to other humans, and restore our own humanity. But how?
Giving is an engagement with both our and others’ humanity. Giving allows others to connect with us, and us to connect with others. An act of giving says, “I see you and your struggle, and I am here for it.” When we give, we create a space for our humanity to grow and connect with others. And in the process of human connection, there is healing.
How did all of this go for Nathan? I wish I could say that he loves God again. Unfortunately, he doesn’t love God, but he is praying. He is struggling, but he is regaining his humanity. He is not completely healed, but he is healing. Nathan’s journey is a pursuit of the beautiful. And in that beauty, Nathan is rediscovering the goodness of himself, others, and of God.
Mario A. Russo is a PhD in Theology (Science and Religion) candidate at Vrije Universiteit Amsterdam, and Director Emeritus of the Dortmund Center for Science and Faith in Dortmund, Germany. He is an ordained pastor who holds several degrees in both Christian theology and the biological sciences, including a Doctor of Ministry from Erskine Theological Seminary, and an Interdisciplinary Bachelor of Science degree in Biology and Psychology from the University of South Carolina. He has written and spoken on various platforms about issues related to science and faith for over 20 years. He lives in Greenville, South Carolina, along with his wife and two children.
1. Get Comfortable with God
Trauma separates us from God. It can lead us to question the goodness and power of God, as well as our own trust in him. Prof. Patitsas says that it is very difficult to heal when our relationship with God is broken. The place to begin with healing ourselves is by rediscovering the beauty of God.
What is the best way to experience the beauty of God? Prayer. Now, I need to be perfectly clear. I am not saying that those hurting from painful church trauma need to pray more. I am saying that they need to experience more of the beauty of God. This can be done through experiencing beauty in nature, music, art, dance, travel, or a dozen other ways. All these experiences of beauty are in some way an experience of God. But the simplest, easiest, most cost-effective way to experience the beauty of God is in prayer.
At first, this can be difficult for a traumatized person. They may be angry at God or struggle with feelings of betrayal. But the process of healing is not a quick or painless one. It requires time and repeated effort. Nathan tried this approach. Some days, he yelled at God. He cried and screamed and told God exactly what he thought about him and his church. Other days, Nathan did nothing but sit in the silent presence of God. Experiencing healing with God is a journey that one never finishes, and it gets slowly better over a long time.
2. Get Comfortable with Yourself
Trauma separates us from ourselves. I once heard someone struggling with trauma describe it this way: “I can’t stand to be around myself.” Part of the process of healing from trauma is getting reacquainted and reunited with yourself.
Victims of church trauma often internalize the rejection they experienced and believe that they deserve it. But they don’t. The work of healing from church trauma is a struggle to accept ourselves just as God accepts us.
I realize that, at first, this doesn’t sound very hopeful. How can we tell people who are struggling with trauma that they must struggle to find healing? Because trauma damages a person, and struggling heals us. When a person is traumatized, they are dehumanized. But to struggle is to be human. It is through struggling to heal from trauma that we regain our humanity.
And what do we say to those who are overwhelmed by the struggle? A beauty-first approach calls us to struggle for them. If they cannot struggle, we will struggle for them until they are ready to join us in their struggle. This is the role that Christians can play. Struggling with and for one another is a form of beauty. We can struggle for the traumatized until they have the strength to struggle. Then, we struggle together. Struggling together is beautiful, and it is part of healing.
3. Get Comfortable with Humanity
Trauma separates us from others. Traumatized persons often isolate themselves from society and allow their friendships to lapse, so a final component of healing and restoring our humanity is reuniting us with the rest of humanity. A simple way of doing this is through giving. Yes, through giving we can reunite ourselves to other humans, and restore our own humanity. But how?
Giving is an engagement with both our and others’ humanity. Giving allows others to connect with us, and us to connect with others. An act of giving says, “I see you and your struggle, and I am here for it.” When we give, we create a space for our humanity to grow and connect with others. And in the process of human connection, there is healing.
How did all of this go for Nathan? I wish I could say that he loves God again. Unfortunately, he doesn’t love God, but he is praying. He is struggling, but he is regaining his humanity. He is not completely healed, but he is healing. Nathan’s journey is a pursuit of the beautiful. And in that beauty, Nathan is rediscovering the goodness of himself, others, and of God.
Mario A. Russo is a PhD in Theology (Science and Religion) candidate at Vrije Universiteit Amsterdam, and Director Emeritus of the Dortmund Center for Science and Faith in Dortmund, Germany. He is an ordained pastor who holds several degrees in both Christian theology and the biological sciences, including a Doctor of Ministry from Erskine Theological Seminary, and an Interdisciplinary Bachelor of Science degree in Biology and Psychology from the University of South Carolina. He has written and spoken on various platforms about issues related to science and faith for over 20 years. He lives in Greenville, South Carolina, along with his wife and two children.