God & Nature Magazine
  • Winter 2023 Issue
    • Letter From the Editors
    • Braden, A Modern Bestiary
    • Garte, Assembly Theory
    • Defoe, The Heavens Declare
    • Greenberg, Bonding
    • Barrigar, God's Big Story
    • Phillippy, Overcoming Paradox
    • Bostrom, Near
    • Clifford, Hidden Figures
    • Budek-Schmeisser, Completion
  • Fall 2022 Issue
    • Letter Fall22
    • Curry, Attentiveness
    • Russo, Deconstruction
    • Touryan, Four Forces
    • Mittchell, Three Words
    • Philippy, Math Theology Fall 22
    • Bostrom, Goodbyes
    • Clifford FAll 22
    • Linsley, Mystic Exile
    • Hall, A Call to Arms
  • Summer 2022 Issue
    • Letter Summer 2022
    • Engelking, Neurotheology
    • Kelley, Environmentalism
    • Garte, Sandpipers
    • Madison, Cultivating Contentment
    • Collins, Answers on Evolution
    • Touryan, Tentmakers
    • Oord, Ever-Creative God
    • Bostrom, Mentors
    • Clifford, Carbon and Sin
    • Campbell, Just, In Time
  • Past Issues
    • Spring 2022 Issue >
      • Letter from the Editors Spring 2022
      • Curry, Knowldege and Truth
      • Pinkham, On a Car Emblem
      • Murray, Candling the Egg
      • Carr, Music, Math, Religion
      • Smith, Wonder and Longing
      • Linsky, Cyber Service
      • Bostrom, Buteo
      • Obi, Coincidences
    • Winter 2022 Issue >
      • Garte &Albert Letter Winter 2022
      • Thuraisingham Pondering Invisible
      • Cornwell Mediations from Molecular Biologist
      • Fagunwa Blsck Scientist & Church Father
      • Garte A Dialogue
      • Gonzalez Being Human
      • Klein Naturalist in Two Worlds
      • Bostrom Creeds
      • Clifford Winter 2022
      • Ardern Contact Points
      • Cooper Imagine No Christmas
    • Fall 2021 Issue >
      • Garte &Albert Letter Fall2021
      • Johnson, God Winks
      • Cottraux, Ancient Aliens
      • Arveson, Anti-Vax Email
      • Gammon, Evolutionary Insights
      • Mitchell, No One Told Me
      • Rummo, Faith in the Invisible
      • Bostrom, Fall Furrows
      • Lemcio, A Franciscan Weekend
      • Funk, Plant Haiku
      • Robinson & Lim, Who is God?
    • Summer 2021 Issue >
      • Garte &Albert Letter Sum2021
      • Warren, Immunization and Salvation
      • Defoe, Bernard Ramm
      • Cornwell Canine to Divine
      • Mix, Running with Nature
      • Pinkham, Scuba Divers
      • Cao, Physics and Bible
      • Bostrom, Sugar Birds
      • Clifford Sum21
      • Oostema, Evolution of Faith
      • Hall, Generation upon Generation
    • Spring 2021 Issue >
      • Garte and Albert Letter Spring 2021
      • Loikanen, Divine Action
      • Madison, Humus and Humility
      • Lappin, Puddles and Persons
      • Cornwell, God's GPS
      • Touryan, Contolled Fusion
      • Russo, Vaccine and Salvation
      • Bostrom, Short-eared Owl
      • Redkoles, Expect Unexpected
      • Clifford, Boring
      • McFarland, Imposition of Carbon
      • Lemcio, Manis Mastodon
    • Winter 2021 Issue >
      • Winter 2021 Contents >
        • Garte and Albert Letter from the Editors
        • Burnett How iit All Started
        • Isaac Director's Corner
        • Ruppel Herrington, First Editor
        • Burnett Origin of Lire
        • Hearn Balance
        • Middleton Natural Theology
        • Story Antibodies and Randomness
        • Lamoureux I Sleep a Lot
        • Warren Overloaded Brains
        • Isaac Knowledge of Information
        • Bancewicz Wonder and Zebrafish
        • Oord Photoessay
        • Albert Hope in Winter
        • Clifford Storytelling & Drama in Teaching
        • Pohl The Column (Poetry)
    • Fall 2020 Issue >
      • Letter from Editors
      • Pohl, Panpsychism and Microbiome
      • Reyes, Communion During Loss
      • Griffin, Hands On
      • Azarvan, Science and Limits
      • Cornwell, Search Engines for God
      • Thuraisingham, Duality of Humans and Particles
      • Touryan, Prayers of Petition
      • George, Perfect Vision
      • Declare the Glory, Green: Awe
      • Bostrom Purpose
      • Oord, Theological Photoessay
      • Clifford, Food, Water, Waste
    • Summer 2020 Issue >
      • Summer 2020 Contents >
        • Editors Letter Summer2020
        • Jones, Science Faith Duopoly
        • Mix, God and the Virus
        • Warner, COVID-19 and Goodness of Creation
        • Gonzalez, Pandemic and Groaning of Creation
        • Johnson, Star Wars Food
        • Pyle, It Takes a (Medical ) Village
        • Arveson, Use for 3D Printers
        • Peterson, Pandemic and Research
        • Zeidan, Mentorship Online
        • Oleskeiwicz, Dragonfly on Water
        • Carr, COVID-19 and Climate Change
        • Nierrman, The Squirrel
        • Cornwell, COVIS-19 Bucket List
        • Bostrom, Grass Thoughts
        • Clifford, Summ20 Conflict
    • Spring 2020 Issue >
      • Letter from the Editors SP20
      • AD
      • Murphy, Nature and Calvary
      • Dickin, The Flood and Genesis 1
      • Gruenberg, Empiricism and Christian Spirituality
      • Ungureanu, Science, Religion, Protestant Tradition
      • Russo, How does it End?
      • Siegrist, Problems with Materialism
      • Ohlman, 20/20 in 2020
      • Warren, Rock Frogs
      • Edwards, Sanctuary
      • Bostrom, Clothed
      • Clifford, The Lent of Lockdown Spring 2020
      • Hall, 1:30 AM on a Tuesday (Poem)
    • Winter 2020 Issue >
      • Letter from the Editor Winter 2020
      • AD
      • Wimberly Inheritance, Meaning and Code
      • Defoe; A Pastor's Journey
      • Mix The Ends of the World
      • Pevarnik Limits of Physics
      • Greenberg "Godly" Science
      • Pinkham Teleological Thinking
      • Alexanian How to Witness
      • "Declare the Glory" Neal, Cross, Gait
      • Clifford "Across the Pond" Winter 2020
      • Oord "Theological Photoessays" Winter 2020
      • Salviander The Objective Man (Poem)
      • Ohlman Orphan of the Universe (Poem)
      • Lemcio Grey's Anatomy (Poem)
    • Fall 2019 Issue >
      • Letter from the Editor Fall 2019
      • Phillippy Mathematics and God
      • Pohl & Thoelen Databases
      • Garte Limits of Science
      • Mitroka Healthy Lifestyle
      • Sigmon Science and Revelation
      • Mariani Compatibility Creation and Evolution
      • Anders Theistic Evolution
      • Touryan Are we alone
      • Johnson Purpose and Source
      • Declare the Glory Curry, Smith, Best
      • Clifford "Across the Pond" Fall 19
      • Oord "Theological Photoessays Fall 19
      • Eyte Cross Cascade "Poem"
    • Summer 2019 Issue >
      • Letter from the Editor Summer 2019
      • Arveson Is There a “Theory of Everything”
      • Anderson The History and Philosophy of Science and Faith
      • Tolsma Science in Church
      • Salviander Black Holes and Atheism
      • Johnson Practical Problems for Literal Adam
      • Hall God and the Assumptions of Scientific Research
      • Linsky Overcoming Misconceptions
      • Wilder Sanctity of Creation
      • Clifford "Across the Pond" Summer19
      • Oord "Theological Photoessays" Summer 2019
      • Flaig Time and Me (Poem)
    • Spring 2019: Creation Care and Environment >
      • Letter from the Editor Spring 2019
      • Bancewicz;Sustainability Pledge: Why the Environment is My Problem
      • Lin; Environmental Problems as a Place for Compromise and Dialogue
      • Garvey; Where the Fall Really Lies
      • Lewis; Solar-Powered Life: Providing Food, Oxygen and Protection
      • Garte; Time and Human Impact on the Environment
      • Mays; Reforming Science Textbooks
      • Carr; Cosmic Energy First, Then Matter: A Spiritual Ethic
      • Kincanon; The Young Earthers and Leibniz
      • Declare the Glory Gauger
      • Clifford "Across the Pond" Spring 2019
      • Oord; Photoessay. Theological Photo Essays
      • Rivera; Photoessay. Digital Artwork: Images of Jesus
      • Albert; Poem. A Goldfish Sings a Tentative Psalm
      • Armstrong; Poem Holy Sonnet XI
    • Winter 2019: Education and Outreach 2 >
      • Letter from the Editor, Winter 2009
      • Applegate; Project Under Construction: Faith Integration Resource for High School Biology
      • LaBelle; Sidewalk Astronomy Evangelism - Taking it to the Streets!
      • Reed; Speaking to the Heart and Mind of Students about Evolution and Creation
      • Marcus; The Conflict Model
      • Rivera; The Implicit Assumptions behind Hitchen's Razor
      • Russo; Redeeming Bias in Discussion of Science and Faith
      • Fischer; Origins, Genesis and Adam
      • Clifford Column, Winter 2019
      • Gait; Photoessay - Stripes
      • Lee; Poem. In Chaos and Nothingness
    • Fall 2018: Education and Outreach 1 >
      • Letter from the Editor Fall 2018
      • Glaze; A Walk within Two Worlds: Faith, Science, and Evolution Advocacy
      • Johnson; Teaching the Controversy in Texas
      • Cootsona; Mere Christianity, Mainstream Science and Emerging Adults
      • Kindstedt; Creating a Third Culture
      • Zeidan; An Effective Way to Integrate Supportive Communication and Christian Belief into Virtual Classrooms
      • Marshall; A New Model of Causation
      • McClure; Nothing in the Bible Makes Sense Except in the Light of Grace
      • Frank; Christianity, Science and Teamwork
      • Assad/Reyes; Interview. Discovering a Renewed Sense of Awe and Wonder about God
      • Clifford Column Fall 2018
      • Menninga; Photoessay. What do These Stones Mean?
    • Summer 2018: Judgment and Peer Review >
      • Letter from the Editors Summer 2018
      • Jones; Peer Review: Avoiding Judgmentalism
      • Arnold; Discovering Spiritual Information Through Peer-Reviewed Science
      • Peterson; Peering at Double-Blind Peer Review
      • Smith; A Philosophical Influence from the Scientific Revolution on Scientific Judgment
      • Mix; The Poetry of Probability
      • Mobley; Randomness vs. the Providence of God?
      • Gordon; Chances are Good: Design and Chance in Genesis 1
      • Siegrist; But the Multiverse...!
      • Reyes; The Community Table: Interview with Marianne Johnson
      • Clifford Column Summer 2018
      • Hill; Poem. Synthesis
      • Lemcio; Poem. I Could See Where This was Going
      • Oord: Photoessay
    • Spring 2018: Chance & Design >
      • Letter from the Editors
      • Bishop; God, Love and Chance
      • Bonham; Quantum Reflections
      • Spaulding; God as Designer
      • Garte; Teleology in Evolution
      • Hall; God, Chance and Buridan's Ox
      • Pohl; Why We Need a Third Culture in Church
      • Dorman; Liturgical Brain
      • Warren; Galapagos
      • Blanchard; On Christian Science
      • Touryan; The Cross as a Cosmic Filter
    • Winter 2018: Race & Inheritance >
      • A Note from the Editors
      • Essay: “Some Pastoral Considerations of CRISPR CAS 9 Gene Editing” by Mario A Russo
      • Essay: “The Genetics and Theology of Race” by Sy Garte
      • Essay: "Grieve the Segregation of Science" by S. Joshua Swamidass
      • Poem: "Cardboard Man" by Ciara Reyes
      • Featured Interview: “Love Is Risk” with Carolyn Finney
      • Essay & Poem: “Abortion Languages: Love, fear, confusion and loss”
      • Essay: "Why the Church Needs Intersectional Feminism" by Emily Herrington
      • Essay: “Elected to Salvation (and other things?)” by Bill Leonard
      • Essay: “Local Colour: A reflection on family, history, and heritage” by Mike Clifford
      • Interview: Corina Newsome, environmentalist and animal keeper
      • Essay: “Spiritual Kin Selection” by Steve Roels
      • Photo Essay: "Trouble in Paradise: Plastic pollution in the Bahamas" by Grace Swing & Robert D Sluka
      • Essay: “Race & Inheritance: Personal reflections and annotations” by Walt Hearn
      • Interview: Carla Ramos, molecular biologist
      • Clifford Column; Discipine Hopping
      • Lemcio; Waves
      • Harris Artwork
      • Hearn; Eulogy - Beyond Science,
    • Summer 17: Cosmology & Theology >
      • Letter from the Editors: Summer 2017
      • Essay: "The News from My Home Galaxy" by Walt Hearn
      • Interview: "Deep Incarnation & the Cosmos: A Conversation with Niels Henrik Gregersen" by Ciara Reyes & Niels Henrik Gregersen
      • Photo Essay: "Breath & Dust" by Kathleen Eady
      • Essay: "Why the Eagle Nebula Just Doesn’t Do It For Me" by Mike Clifford
      • Essay: "The Cosmos in My Hand" by Lucas Mix
      • Interview: “What is Life? On Earth and Beyond” with Andreas Losch
      • Artwork by Missy Pellone
      • Essay: "When God & Science Hide Reality" by Davis Woodworth
      • Essay: "​In Search of Wonder: A Reflection on Reconciling Medieval and Modern Cosmology" by Monica Bennett
      • Essay: "If Christianity and Cosmology Are in Conflict, Whose Side Is Philosophy on?" by Vaughan Rees
    • Winter/Spring 17: "Flesh & Blood" >
      • Letter from the Editor: Winter/Spring 2017
      • Essay: "Probiotics, Prebiotics, Synbiotics: On microbiomes and the meaning of life" by John F. Pohl
      • Essay: "With All Your Mind" by Paul S. Kindsedt
      • Essay: "The Stuff of Life" by Mike Clifford
      • Essay: "Experiencing God’s Love in a Secular Society: A Christian experience with socialized medicine" by Alison Noble
      • Poem: "The Problem with Pain" by Eugne E. Lemcio
      • Essay: "Thoughts of Death in a Cruel World: Job’s suicidal ideation and the “right” Christian response to depression" by Jennifer Michael Hecht and Emily Herrington
      • Essay: "Tissues at Issue" by Walt Hearn
      • Essay: "The Dilemma of Modern Christianity" by Tony Mitchell
      • Poem: "Light" by Billie Holladay Skelley
      • Essay: "Some Theological Implications of Science: Revisiting the Ant" by Mario A. Russo
    • Summer/Fall 16: "Stewardship of Words" >
      • Letter from the Editor: Summer 2016
      • Levity: "Walt Being Walt: Excerpts from the ASA newsletter" by Walt Hearn (compiled by Jack Haas & Emily Ruppel)
      • Poem: "A Prayer Tribute to Walt and Ginny Hearn" by Paul Fayter
      • Essay: "Authentic Science & Authentic Christian Faith" by Paul Arveson
      • Essay: "On Modern-Day Saints & Epistles" by Emily Ruppel
      • Essay: "​Mathematics and the Religious Impulse" by Karl Giberson
      • Poem: "The Wasteful Gene" by Eugne E. Lemcio
      • Three Poems by Dan Eumurian
      • Excerpts from: "The Dictionary of Daily Life in Biblical and Post-Biblical Antiquity" by Edwin Yamauchi
      • Essay: "A Comprehensible Universe: The blessing from God that makes science possible" by Bob Kaita
      • Poem: "The Epistolarian" by Emily Ruppel
    • Spring 16: "Brain Science" >
      • Letter from the Editor: Spring 2016
      • Essay: "Ancient Q, Modern A (?)" by Walt Hearn
      • Essay: "Souls, Brains and People: Who or what are we?" by Gareth D. Jones
      • Essay: "A Functional Theology of Psychopathology" by Edgar Paul Herrington IV
      • Three Poems by Richard Gillum
      • Essay: "Thoughts of Death in an Unkind World: Job’s suicidal ideation and the “right” Christian response to depression" by Jennifer Michael Hecht
      • Short Story: "Malefic" by Jeffrey Allen Mays
      • Essay: "An Engineer Visits a Mindfulness Workshop" by Mike Clifford
      • Essay: "Traces of Trauma in the Body of Christ: The case of The Place of Refuge" by Elizabeth Hernandez
      • Essay: "Did God ‘Create’ Science? Christianity and the uniqueness of the human brain" by William H. Church
    • Winter 16: "Quantum Physics/Epigenetics" >
      • Letter from the Editor: Winter 2016
      • Essay: "God and the New Evolutionary Biology" by Sy Garte
      • Essay: "Quantum Mechanics and the Question of Divine Knowledge" by Stephen J. Robinson
      • Essay: "Creation Out of... Physics?" by Joshua Scott
      • Essay: "Of Books and Bosons" by Mike Clifford
      • Essay: "Words, Words, Words" by Walt Hearn
      • Poem: "Encountering Ernst Haeckel’s 'Ontogeny Recapitulates Phylogeny'" by Eugene Lemcio
      • Essay: "The Extended Evolutionary Synthesis: New conversations and theological questions at the horizons of modern science" by Michael Burdett
      • Poem: "The Difference" by Emily Ruppel
      • Essay: "Maupertuis's Ghost: Finding God in 'action'" by Colin C. Campbell
    • Fall 15: "Technology" >
      • Letter from the Editor: Fall 2015
      • Essay: "‘Braving the New World (Wide Web): Mapping Theological Response to Media" by Justin A. Bailey
      • Poem: "Entropy and Enthalpy" by Glenn R. McGlaughlin
      • Essay: "‘How Proactive Should Christians Be in Learning about Emerging Biomedical Technologies?" by D. Gareth Jones
      • Essay: "‘Can We Fix It? Erm..." by Mike Clifford
      • Poem: "To My Dear Parents" by Sarah Ruden
      • Essay: "‘Which Side, Lord?" by Walt Hearn
      • Poem: "The Column" by John F. Pohl
      • Essay: "‘Technology and the Church" by Derek Schuurman
      • Poem: "On the Shores of Oroumieh" by Emily Ruppel
      • Essay: "‘Technology as Discipline" by Johnny Wei-Bing Lin
    • Summer 15: "Doubt" >
      • Letter from the Editor: Summer 2015
      • Essay: "‘The Road Not Taken’: A personal reflection on careers, counterfactuals and callings" by Tim Middleton
      • Essay: "The Gift of Doubt in My Life" by Rev. Paul Herrington
      • Poem: "The Marsh Birds" by Sarah Ruden
      • Essay: "On St Brendan and the Pendulum of Postgraduate Study" by Mike Clifford
      • Essay: "Doubt: The Invisible Conversation" by Karl W. Giberson
      • Essay: "Doubt, Faith, and Crevasses on My Mind" by Peter M. J. Hess
      • Poem: "Magdalene" by Leonore Wilson
      • Essay: "Breaking Barriers, Ministering in Relationships, and Exemplifying the Gospel" by Stephen Contakes, et al.
      • Poem: "On the Extinction of Matter Near a Black Hole" by Ruth Hoppin
      • Essay: "Sometimes I Doubt..." by Walt Hearn
      • Essay: "The Risks of Love and Life's Big Questions" by Thomas Jay Oord
    • Spring 15: "Animals/Imago Dei" >
      • Letter from the Editor: Spring 2015
      • Essay: "50 Years of Wilderness: a Christian perspective" by Peter van der Burgt
      • Essay: "All Creatures Great and Small " by Walt Hearn
      • Essay: "Let There Be Less: A Christian musing on nature, faith, and farmers’ markets" by Emily Ruppel
      • Poem: "The New Plant and Animal Kingdoms" by Steve Roels
      • Essay: "Of Wonder and Zebrafish" by Ruth Bancewicz
      • Essay: "The Lion, the Spider and the Image of God" by Mike Clifford
      • Cat Poem 1: "Lullaby for Stomp the Cat" by Sarah Ruden
      • Cat Poem 2: "Letting the Dog In" by Emily Ruppel
      • Cat Poem 3: "Reading on the Couch" by Carol Ruppel
      • Essay: "Angry Discussions: A Wrong Way to Stand for Creation Care or Science Advocacy " by Oscar Gonzalez
      • Essay: "Ethical Eating on a Catholic Campus: Some thoughts from a student of environmental studies" by Grace Mican
    • Winter 15: "Information" >
      • Letter from the Editor: Winter 2015
      • Essay: "What Does it Mean to Know?" by Mark Shelhamer
      • Essay: "Knowledge of Information" by Randy Isaac
      • Photo Essay: "Being Here" by Carol Ruppel
      • Essay: "Truth Anyone?" by Walt Hearn
      • Poem: "Transformation" by Ruth Hoppin
      • Interview: "Unpacking Chance, Providence, and the Abraham's Dice Conference" by Olivia Peterson
      • Essay: "On Knowledge and Information–Tales from an English childhood" by Mike Clifford
      • Poem: "Space Travel" by Ruth Hoppin
      • Essay: "Resuming the Science/Faith Conversation" by Jamin Hubner
    • Archives >
      • Past Contributors
      • Unpublished Materal >
        • Richard Graven A Vision of God
      • Fall 14: "History of Science & Christianity" >
        • Letter from the Editor: Fall 2014
        • Essay: "Orchids: Why the founders of modern science cultivated virtue" by Ruth Bancewicz
        • Essay: "Science Falsely So Called: Fundamentalism and Science" by Edward B. Davis
        • Essay: "The Other 'Atom' in Christianity and Science" by Karissa D Carlson
        • Poem: "The Hermit" by Ciara C. Reyes
        • Essay: "Players" by Walt Hearn
        • Essay: "Using Storytelling and Drama in Engineering Lectures" by Mike Clifford
        • Essay: "Is There Anything Historical About Adam and Eve?" by Mike Beidler
        • Essay: "Finding Harmony in Controversy: The early years of the ASA" by Terry Gray and Emily Ruppel
        • Levity: "Fish n' Chips" by Mike Arnold
        • Essay: "Stories" by Walt Hearn
      • Summer 14: "Christian Women in Science" >
        • Letter from the Editor: Summer 2014
        • Essay: "I Really Did That Work: A brief survey of notable Christian Women in Science" by Lynn Billman
        • Essay: "He + She = We" by Walt Hearn
        • Photo Essay: "The Faces of Nature" by Susan Limone
        • Essay: "On Grass that Withers: Overloaded brains and spiritual discernment" by Janet Warren
        • Interview: "Ancient Humans and Modern Choices" with Briana Pobiner
        • Essay: "Crystallographer, Quaker, Pacifist, & Trailblazing Woman of Science: Kathleen Lonsdale’s Christian Life 'Lived Experimentally'” by Kylie Miller and Stephen M. Contakes
        • Artwork: "Eden, Zion" by Harold Sikkema
        • Essay: "Asking the Right Question" by Dorothy Boorse
        • Interview: "Not So Dry Bones" with Mary Schweitzer
        • Essay: "Is Being a Mother and a Scientist Worth It?" by Abby Hodges
        • Essay: "Playing God: A theological reflection on medicine, divine action, and personhood" by Ann Pederson
        • Column: Great Gravity! "BNL 1976 – 2000 (Part 1)"
      • Spring 14: "G&N: The 2-year tour" >
        • Letter from the Editor: Spring 2014
        • Essay: "Political Science?" by Walt Hearn
        • Comic: "Education"
        • Essay: "Finding Hominids with Kamoya Kimeu" by Fred Heeren
        • Poem: "Ziggurat (and Helix)" by Amy Chai
        • Creative Nonfiction: "One Summer" by Dave Harrity
        • Essay: "Do the Heavens Declare the Glory of God?" by Owen Gingerich
        • Comic: "Miracle Mechanics" by Emily Ruppel
        • Essay: "I Sleep A Lot" by Denis O. Lamoureux
        • Poem: "Angels and RNA" by Walt Hearn
        • Comic: "Seminary"
        • Essay: "The Elegance of Antibodies" by Craig M. Story
        • Photo Essay: "Conversing with Nature" by Thomas Jay Oord
        • Essay: "Under the Tutelage of Trees: Arboreal Lessons on Virtue, Kinship, and Integrity" by Peter M. J. Hess
        • Comic: "Humor"
        • Essay: "Science and Scientism in Biology" by Sy Garte
        • Interview: "Biopsychology and Faith" with Heather Looy
      • Winter 14: "Health & Medicine" >
        • Letter from the Editor: Winter 2014
        • Poem: I Have a Piece of Cow in My Heart
        • Essay: Acts of God: Are all mutations random?
        • Column: Beyond Science
        • Poem: Psalm 1859
        • Essay: The Tao of Departing
        • Essay: The Tao of Departing p 2
        • Photo Essay: Walking in Winter
        • Essay: A Christian Doctor on Evolution, Faith, and Suffering
        • Opinion: Making Friends with Frankencorn
        • Poem: Chiaroscuro
        • Interview: "Biopsychology and Faith" with Heather Looy
        • Essay: "The Elegance of Antibodies"
        • Artwork: "Helix" by Harold Sikkema
        • Column: Great Gravity! "Dissertations and Revelations"
      • Fall 13: "Environmentalism" >
        • Letter from the Editor: Fall 2013
        • Poem: Time
        • Essay: Is there Hope for the Ocean?
        • Artwork: "Earthly Tent" by Harold Sikkema
        • Essay: What is Responsible Eating?
        • Essay: Are We Too Obsessed with Food?
        • Poem: Conversation on Creation
        • Essay: Creation Care from the Perspective of a Conservation Geneticist
        • Essay: Mobilizing Scientists for Environmental Missions
        • Poem: Paleocene Spring
        • Interview: Dorothy Boorse
        • Column: Beyond Science
        • Essay: New Testament Motivation for Environmental Stewardship
        • Poem: Stone of House
        • Column: Great Gravity! "Running the Data"
      • Summer 13: "Science & Creativity" >
        • Column: Beyond Science
        • Letter from the Editor: Summer 2013
        • Column: Faith on the Field
        • Poem: Trying Not to Be Too Sunny
        • Comic: "Work in Progress"
        • Essay: Do the Heavens Declare the Glory of God?
        • Essay: Science, Faith, and Creativity
        • Essay: One Summer
        • Comic: "Miracle Mechanics"
        • Featured Essay: Poetry for Scientists
        • Artwork: "Confluence" by Harold Sikkema
        • Column: Great Gravity! "The Great Ungainly Journey West"
      • Winter 13 >
        • Letter from the Editor: Winter 2013
        • Column: Faith on the Field
        • Comic: "Apples to Apples"
        • Creative Nonfiction: "One Winter"
        • Column: Clearing the Middle Path
        • Essay: Science and Scientism in Biology
        • Poem: "Angels and RNA"
        • Feature Article: I Sleep A Lot
        • Poem: "Fragile"
        • Column: Beyond Science
        • CiS 2012 Student Essay Contest: Runner Up
        • Essay: Why Awe?
        • CiS 2012 Student Essay Contest: First Place
        • Column: Great Gravity! "A Bit of Perspective"
        • Column: Modern Frontiers, Ancient Faith
        • Column: Time Capsule
      • Fall 12 >
        • Letter from the Editor: Fall 2012
        • The Director's Corner
        • Column: Faith on the Field
        • Comic: "Education"
        • Interview: Greetings from Mars!
        • Column: Clearing the Middle Path
        • Photo Essay: "Conversing with Nature"
        • Comic: "Abe"
        • Essay: Evolution and Imago Dei
        • Poem: "Locus Iste"
        • Levity: Beyond Science
        • Essay: God, Occam, and Science
        • Opinion: Humility and Grace
        • Levity: Great Gravity! "The College Years"
        • Poem: "Q.E.D."
        • Essay: My Overlapping Magisteria
        • Column: Time Capsule
      • Summer 12 >
        • Table of Contents
        • Letter from the Editor: Summer 2012
        • Director's Corner
        • Column: Faith on the Field
        • Column: Modern Frontiers, Ancient Faith
        • Comic: "Seminary"
        • Poem: "Temptation in the Wired Wilderness"
        • Levity: Beyond Science
        • Opinion: "The Breaking Bread"
        • Comic: "Humor"
        • Column: Clearing the Middle Path
        • Poem: "Ziggurat (and Helix)"
        • Levity: Great Gravity! "The Grade School Years"
        • Opinion: "Adam and the Origin of Man"
        • Poem: "Missa Solemnis"
        • Column: Time Capsule
      • Spring 12 >
        • Table of Contents
        • Letter from the Editor: Spring 2012
        • Director's corner
        • Column: Faith on the Field
        • Column: Time Capsule
        • Poem: "From Where do We Come?"
        • Featured Scientist
        • Levity: Beyond Science
        • Essay: "Faith and Science"
        • Fiction: "A Matter of Dust"
        • Levity: Great Gravity! "The Early Years"
        • Opinion: "Phony Environmental Theology"
        • Fiction: "Illumination"
        • Interview: "Process"
        • Column: Modern Frontiers, Ancient Faith
    • Spring 13 >
      • Letter from the Editor: Spring 2013
      • Column: Faith on the Field
      • Faith on the Field, cont.
      • Poem: Scientist's Psalm
      • Essay: A Downcast Spirit Dries Up the Bones: More perspectives on depression
      • Artwork: "Lipo Osteo" by Harold Sikkema
      • Feature: The Bible, Evolution, and Grace
      • Column: Beyond Science
      • Book Review: Prisoners of Hope
      • Column: Great Gravity! "The Grad School Years"
  • Submit/Contact
  • Information
    • Author Guidelines
    • About God & Nature + Search

I Sleep A Lot

Picture
by Denis O. Lamoureux

“Can you prove to me that the resurrection actually happened?” This was the very first question that was launched at me in September 1997, during the first minute of my first class teaching Science and Religion at St. Joseph’s College, University of Alberta. Of course, the question caught me off guard, because it was completely out of context. I mumbled and stumbled and can’t remember what I said. But I do recall thinking to myself that if this is what teaching theology is going to be like, then I wanted to cross the street and return to the Faculty of Dentistry where I had been a clinical instructor for previous six years. Teaching students how to pull teeth is a lot easier!

Fifteen years later, I’m sitting in a campus pub across from the student who asked that very first question, sharing a good laugh about how my theological teaching career began. This is one of the most blessed aspects of being a university professor. A number of our students become life-long friends. Not only that, the irony of teaching such talented young men and women is that they end up teaching professors as much as their professors teach them.

In that inaugural class, I knew intuitively that this young man was special. And indeed he was. He was incredibly bright and was being pursued by the university to go to graduate school in his specialized scientific discipline. But instead he went off to seminary to study theology. There were more pressing and larger questions that needed to be answered. Eventually the reality of having to make a living caught up to him. He became a very successful businessman, making six figures a year and working only a few hours a week. Yet as the theme of the Book of Ecclesiastes reveals, he has come to see the vanity of it all. And he reminds me that I predicted he would return to the academy, because it’s the pursuit of those questions about the meaning of life that beacon the human soul. Sure enough, here we were, sitting in a campus pub (where so many important decisions are made), and he was exploring the possibility of graduate school in philosophy.

And then in midst of our conversation, he said it. “I sleep a lot.” For most people, these four words mean very little. But for me, they shout out. It’s because I suffer from depression, and the classic sign of this medical condition is that patients sleep a lot. Cautiously, I asked him more about why he slept so much. I revealed to him that this was the main symptom that led to my diagnosis. As he slowly opened this dark region of his life, I felt comfortable asking another question, one that few of us ask our friends. “Ever think about ending it all?”

Yes, the “s” word. The word no one wants to talk about, let alone admit having pondered seriously, especially if you are a Christian. I further disclosed that I had thought about suicide before, and often yearned that my life would end. In fact, I knew exactly what I would write on the suicide note. “I’m tired of being tired.” But despite the power of these feelings, taking my life was only a thought and never a reality. My faith was my rock. I knew well that if I ever took my life, I would soon be standing in front of Jesus with absolutely no excuse. Besides, I could not do that to those I love—my family, my friends, and my students, like this former student in front of me. And then I said to him, what I believe needs to be said from the pulpit in every church. “It’s OK to get psychiatric help; and it’s OK to use medication. It’s not against God’s will.”

One of the most enlightening aspects of being treated for depression is that a doctor takes an inventory of your life. It’s here where I realized that for years I have been doing things that are not healthy for my brain. Though there is a history of depression in my family that few ever talked about, the primary etiological factor of my condition was that I simply had not taken time off from school/work. In graduate school, I did two masters degrees in 24 months and two doctoral degrees in 80 months. To finance my education I practiced dentistry. So I went from the library or laboratory to the dental clinic and back again without any holidays, assuming that a change was as good as break. Wrong. The chronic stress in both grad school and dental practice are well-known. My brain needed a break. And since beginning my teaching career in 1997, I had never taken a holiday. I’d assumed that going to a conference like the annual American Scientific Affiliation meeting was the same as a break. Wrong again. As much as I love being with my pals like Terry Gray, Paul Seely, and Kirk Bertsche, we spend most of our time debating the issues of science and religion. And with these guys, you’ve got to be at your academically best … or else!

The greatest revelation of my psychiatric evaluation was identifying my weekly habits. I’ll admit there’s a bit of righteous pride in saying I work for six days and then take Sunday off. But is Sunday really a day off for me? It’s not. I might be sitting quietly in a pew listening, but my brain is in overdrive thinking theologically. Where this became painfully evident was when I looked at my written notes for my book Evolutionary Creation (2008). I have pages upon pages of stapled offering envelopes from my church with penciled-in ideas for the book. And this is a problem for many of us in ministry. Sunday is not a day off and we need to find a day to rest both our soul and our brain. So here is the bottom line: I started graduate school in September 1984, and up until about two years ago, I haven’t taken a real holiday or observed the Sabbath in any restful way.

Something had to snap. But depression is not like a broken leg. Many times, it slowly creeps up on you. There isn’t a day when I can say “I became depressed.” I knew I was tired when I finished graduate school, but just thought that was normal, and assumed it would go away. But it didn’t. The stress also continued; first in establishing the first tenure-track position for Science and Religion in Canada, and then competing for tenure in a research university. Sleeping during the day began around this time. It started with a 20-minute nap at lunch. Then it extended to an hour, then two hours, and then up to four hours. That and I was sleeping eight to nine hours at night. The breaking point came when I started to sleep for an hour after supper. That hit me hard. I knew that there was something terribly wrong. My parents are in their mid-80s and they only needed a one-hour nap after lunch. But I was in my mid-50s and I needed to sleep twice a day to function. Even after all this sleeping, I still felt tired.


So how did I end up in the psychiatrist’s office? It was the personal testimony of friends who had suffered from depression and who have been and are being successfully treated by medication. It’s worth underlining that all of them were wonderfully committed Christians.


Picture
Jean Francois Millet's "Noonday Rest"
Having many friends in medicine, I went to them and was tested for everything they could imagine (seems like they drew gallons of blood!). All the tests came back negative. Then my GP suggested maybe I was depressed. I quickly wroteoff that diagnosis by insisting that I was not unhappy. I was just always tired. Nevertheless, he told me that when I was ready to accept that possibility, he would refer me to a psychiatrist. As a former clinician, using medication is in principle not a problem for me. Yet I had reservations about psychiatric drugs; I just didn’t want to be hooked to pills. Besides, I didn’t for a second believe that I was depressed. I was living my professional dream—teaching and researching science and religion in a public university. But in fact, I was depressed, and worst I didn’t know it despite being told that it was probably cause of my tiredness.

So how did I end up in the psychiatrist’s office? It was the personal testimony of friends who had suffered from depression and who have been and are being successfully treated by medication. It’s worth underlining that all of them were wonderfully committed Christians. Looking back now, this is where I believe the Lord started sending messengers (angels) my way. The first was a university professor in the medical school who seemed to be one of the happiest people I knew. This person shared stories of not being able to function without medication. Another was a professor I met at an ASA meeting who revealed to me their family tree was dotted with suicides. A third was a personal friend, one of the most stable individuals I’ve ever met. This is a clinician who was put on meds following graduate school, and who told me it saved her marriage. Lastly, a dental classmate came forward. He was instrumental in my coming to Christ. He was also one of most energetic people I’ve known. His story of depression reducing him to a shadow of a man hit close to home, because when he shared his story, I was working no more than four to five hours a day. It was at that point that I phoned my GP and asked for a referral to a psychiatrist. And I have never regretted that decision.

I think it’s worth sharing a bit about my experience with the medications, and of course this is only my experience because people react differently to them. It took eight months and seven different drugs before finding one that worked. Some of these made me incredibly nauseous with pounding headaches. I was within three weeks of handing in my resignation at Christmas 2010 before a drug started to have a positive effect. It was slow and very subtle. The naps in the afternoon got shorter and shorter, and after about a month, they stopped completely. It’s worth noting there is no sense of feeling “high” or “jacked-up.” Surprisingly, and this may seem hard to believe, but I had forgotten what it was to feel rested. That’s the main “feeling” I have experienced being on medication. 

About eight months into the treatment, I slipped a bit, and my psychiatrist placed me on a second medication. This often happens. My only restrictions are that I have to take the drugs on schedule and be in bed about the same time every night. This past summer I was slowly removed from one of my anti-depressants, and this coming summer, we’ll try stopping the second. But my psychiatrist thinks I will probably be on this one for the rest of my life. So be it. At least, I got my life back. 

One of the most revelatory moments of my battle with depression was a comment made by my pharmacist when the first drug started to work. I told him that I probably should have been on anti-depressants 10-12 years ago. 

He replied, “You have no idea how many people say this the first time a medication works.” Then he said, “It’s the stigma of depression within our culture that stops us from seeking treatment.” Roughly 20-25% of us will suffer from depression requiring medication, but regrettably many will suffer without knowing help is near. And this is the reason I wrote this short testimonial. The stigma about depression needs to be destroyed. And those who have benefited from anti-depressants need to stand up and be heard. 

For me, it was the testimony of Christian friends that was critical in my seeking treatment. I’m quite passionate about this topic. In my Science and Religion class, there is a point in the course where I put my anti-depressants on an overhead and tell the students that I would not be teaching if it were not for the medication. It gets pretty quiet in the classroom. It’s a poignant and holy moment. Thankful emails from students on medication quickly arrive. Most are from Christians who feel “guilty” and “damaged” for being on meds. I assure them that it’s not against God’s will. Rather, we should praise the Lord because we live in a time when the blessing of psychiatric science can help heal our brains and souls.

    Respond to this:

Submit
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
God & Nature magazine is a publication of the American Scientific Affiliation, an international network of Christians in science: www.asa3.org